00:00:00:01 - 00:00:34:24
Mary Daphne
Hello Advanced English Learners, welcome back to another conversation between Greg and myself. We're so excited that you're joining us today. As you know, we like doing these native English speaker conversations as a way to help you improve your pronunciation, work on new vocab and new phrases, get more accustomed to hearing native English speakers talk and just starting to, you know, work even more on your listening comprehension, all of which are steps, key pillars towards fluency.

00:00:35:06 - 00:00:47:25
Mary Daphne
So with that being said, we're going to jump right into today's conversation topic, which is all about work life balance. All right. So let's get right into it.

00:00:53:03 - 00:01:13:19
Mary Daphne
All right. So I think a lot of us have heard this sort of buzz term these days in light of the last few years where a lot of people have, you know, worked more in remote locations and at home. Right. So we have this idea of work life balance or you might have also heard work life blend.

00:01:14:04 - 00:01:17:02
Mary Daphne
So let's talk a little bit about that. What are your thoughts here, Greg?

00:01:17:24 - 00:01:47:17
Greg
Yeah. Work life balance has existed for a while as a concept. I think it first came about in an era when people started to work more service oriented jobs, right, where there was an ambiguous amount of work to be done. Right. Right. Or another way to put it is there is an infinite amount of work to be done with no clear boundaries on when that should start.

00:01:47:19 - 00:02:09:00
Greg
So if you think about a factory, you know, the classic Ford factory where there is an assembly line and you're churning out cars, the people who go in, the workers will clock in and clock out at very specific hours. And they have a quota of, you know, a certain number of widgets to make within that set of hours.

00:02:09:00 - 00:02:21:04
Greg
Right. So the work life boundary is very clear. When you get into the factory, you're at work. When you leave the factory, you're not. And the times are clear and the output during the time you're there is clear.

00:02:21:11 - 00:02:21:21
Mary Daphne
Right.

00:02:21:22 - 00:02:42:27
Greg
Now, compare that to a modern job, particularly a service job, you know, what people call white collar jobs, right? Where you had an office at a computer and you might have goals for a week or a month or a year, but you don't necessarily have specific goals for that day in terms of how much you're supposed to get done and what exactly it is you're supposed to get done.

00:02:43:19 - 00:03:11:28
Greg
Right. Things are sort of more fluid. Yeah. And that happens. It's much harder for, you know, the person to say, oh, I'm done now. Right. Because it's like, well, at what point am I where the sort of where are the boundaries? And so that that sort of sets the context for this work life balance. People started realizing as their jobs became more abstract, they started realizing, Huh, I actually don't really know when I'm done.

00:03:12:23 - 00:03:15:06
Greg
And so I might as well just work another hour.

00:03:15:13 - 00:03:43:11
Mary Daphne
That's right. Yeah. I feel like with this new sort of concept of, well, like you said, this more abstract take on service jobs. There is no clear beginning, middle and end in a lot of ways. I mean, if you're working on a product and you're working on different iterations or you're working on some sort of, you know, product that you need to ship by a certain date, that can become a little bit clearer because you have a due date that's established.

00:03:43:21 - 00:03:57:09
Mary Daphne
But a lot of times it can be quite nebulous, right? Unclear as to when it is done. As you said, I really like that because I feel like it is so relevant these days.

00:03:57:19 - 00:04:04:24
Greg
Yeah. And another component to it that is more recent, I would say in the last probably decade or.

00:04:04:24 - 00:04:05:05
Mary Daphne
So.

00:04:05:21 - 00:04:16:05
Greg
Is the introduction of the Internet at home. Right. Right. The ability to take work home with you, whether it's on your laptop or your smartphone.

00:04:16:09 - 00:04:16:28
Mary Daphne
Tablet.

00:04:16:28 - 00:04:46:13
Greg
Or your tablet. Right. Suddenly you can get work, e-mail, emails at home. Suddenly you're always online, you're always accessible from your boss. And because of that, there's another sort of vector into your personal life, right? The work has another vector into your personal life. So not only is the amount of work you need to complete ambiguous, additionally, you can technically work at any time of day in any location.

00:04:46:22 - 00:05:00:13
Greg
And so it really becomes difficult psychologically to decide, am I working right now or am I not working right? I'm doing the rest of my life the so-called work life balance?

00:05:00:13 - 00:05:20:29
Mary Daphne
Right. And sometimes, you know, it's not so much a balance because you end up working way more than you know you need to. You're supposed to. And you're bleeding into your, you know, your life such that you're forgetting to eat. You don't have time to go grocery shopping. You're neglecting your spouse and your children and your pets.

00:05:21:00 - 00:05:39:15
Mary Daphne
And, you know, there's just so many things that need your attention that haven't been getting your attention, especially when, as you said, you know, you're in a work from home setting. You know, it's so easy to just say, okay, well, I'm supposed to sign off now, but let me just get an hour or two of work in just an extra hour or two.

00:05:40:21 - 00:06:12:11
Mary Daphne
You know, there is this new term that came out very recently called Quiet Quitting. Mm. And it's really interesting. And I say interesting because, you know, there is this new movement where people are starting to, you know, resign themselves from working more than they need to. And I wonder in a way, if it's like a response to this work life balance that is not being achieved.

00:06:13:00 - 00:06:53:07
Mary Daphne
Because if someone feels like they're not, you know, getting appreciated or rewarded or compensated or, you know, given a pat on the back for their job well done, then they start to sort of, you know, withdraw, withdraw and sort of, you know, think, well, if this is not being valued, then I'm not going to try as hard. I wanted to talk a little bit about that because on one hand, I find that it's like, okay, it's like asserting themselves, like asserting yourself and standing up for, you know, your job description, what's what's within the parameters of that job.

00:06:53:17 - 00:07:02:00
Mary Daphne
But on the other hand, I feel like it's like checking out and I'm not really sure I'm not sure what to make of it. So I'm curious to hear your thoughts.

00:07:02:01 - 00:07:34:04
Greg
Yeah, I agree that it is symptomatic of this increasing blend of work and life. Right. And it's almost an immune response to that. Right. At a certain point, particularly younger people or I don't think that's fair to I think anyone of any age will say enough is enough. I have other things to do with my life. Yeah, it's one thing if you're the founder of a company, right, and you hold a large equity position and so every hour you put in can materially increase, you know, your net worth, right?

00:07:34:08 - 00:07:54:27
Greg
If you're just an employee, at the end of the day, you do your job, but you also have other things that are important to you, right? You don't necessarily have the same upside as the top executives. And so you don't have the same motivation. Yeah, right. And so in that context, it's very understandable that people would say, what's the incentive for me to go above and beyond here?

00:07:54:27 - 00:08:24:17
Greg
Right. Why not just do sort of what's the basic requirements and clock out? And so I get that perspective. What I can say personally is in those situations, or if you adopt in that posture, can be a sort of self-fulfilling prophecy. Yeah. Whereas you start to withdraw a bit from your work to do the actual work and going to work becomes a.

00:08:24:17 - 00:08:25:02
Mary Daphne
Chore.

00:08:25:02 - 00:08:54:12
Greg
A chore, a burden, and it starts to become more and more unpleasant. And so you might feel like you're doing yourself justice by quietly withdrawing. But the reality is, psychologically, you're actually causing yourself harm because you're forcing yourself to do something you don't like. You're sort of ingrained in this rebellion in your brain, and it just makes working unpleasant.

00:08:54:12 - 00:09:20:01
Greg
Right? Right. And you sort of enter this unhappy state. Whereas an alternative is to actually voice your concerns with your manager. Right. And if you actually can express what's frustrating you, why you feel the need to withdraw, to quiet quit if you can do that, then you can actually have a conversation with them about, you know, how to address that situation.

00:09:20:19 - 00:09:43:17
Greg
If you're feeling undervalued, how can you feel more valued? Do you need a raise? Do you need a promotion? Do you need greater responsibility? Right. There's a lot of ways to address these problems. And by sort of quietly just withdrawing passively, it feels to me like it's going to cause yourself more, more harm than, you know, than any kind of good.

00:09:44:02 - 00:10:17:03
Mary Daphne
Right. Yeah. I think the net benefit to that is minimal because like you said, you know, it's about, I think psychologically too, which is something that you mentioned you start to withdraw and then that will start to turn into these like, you know, it will have a reach on your interactions on, you know, the way you do your job and it just will result in underperforming, which is ultimately not what you want to do because you want to, you know, do your job well.

00:10:17:04 - 00:10:34:13
Greg
Yeah, it doesn't make you look good. It doesn't help. Like you said, I think it can definitely materially impact your relationship with your colleagues. They'll feel that distance. Yeah, that disengagement. And so let's say you eventually do quit, which is probably what I would eventually lead to. Yeah. Are you quitting? Are you getting...

00:10:34:24 - 00:10:35:07
Mary Daphne
Fired?

00:10:35:29 - 00:10:51:10
Greg
By the time you actually leave, you've essentially burned some bridges there, right? If you want recommendations for a job down the line, it might be harder to get because you know, the last thing they remember of you is sort of being disengaged and checked out.

00:10:51:10 - 00:10:59:06
Mary Daphne
Checked out. Yeah. They won't remember all the benefits that you know, all the pluses that you had, all the value you've created.

00:10:59:15 - 00:11:01:23
Greg
The passion you had when you first joined. Right.

00:11:01:24 - 00:11:23:11
Mary Daphne
So I think it's like you said, it's important to sort of reevaluate why you want to quiet quit, reassess that position, and then have the conversations you need to have. Right. Maybe it is more about work life balance. Maybe it's as simple as creating the boundaries that you need, putting those in place so that you don't want to quiet quit.

00:11:24:04 - 00:11:24:24
Mary Daphne
Yeah, right.

00:11:24:24 - 00:11:46:17
Greg
Absolutely. What I would say is if you felt that you needed to express it. If you don't feel like it's the work environment is a safe place to express it and consider quitting. Right, or start looking for another job. What I would not recommend is using quiet quitting as a long term strategy. At best I would say it's an interim strategy while you transition to a new job.

00:11:46:28 - 00:12:13:26
Mary Daphne
And that's just a crutch. It's an excuse. It's putting the band aid as a putting on the Band-Aid as opposed to getting to the, you know, treating the wound. Yeah. Not to get graphic or anything, but like, you know, it's sort of that analogy there. And I think that the more we can have frank conversations and transparent communication, the more we'll be able to, you know, achieve our purpose and find out what that purpose is ultimately.

00:12:13:26 - 00:12:38:01
Mary Daphne
Because if you have purpose and you have purpose in the roles that work and the relationships you're creating and you're, you know, the projects that you're working on, then you're not going to feel like you need to quite quit now. It's just not going to even come across, you know, come onto your radar. So it's important. It's, you know, thinking about not just the problem, but the systemic, the root cause of that problem.

00:12:38:01 - 00:13:06:01
Mary Daphne
Right. That's kind of the thing to consider. Yep. And so with that being said, you know, maybe with your work life balance, you're really starting to think about, you know, what your priorities are for work and for life and remembering to take care of yourself. Right. Making sure that you're fueling properly. Your nutrition is good. You know, you're getting your activity and you're building the relationships that matter to you.

00:13:06:01 - 00:13:10:23
Mary Daphne
You're doing something fun because these are important aspects of life.

00:13:11:01 - 00:13:35:18
Greg
Yeah, for me, I think the easiest way to maintain work life balance is to regularly check in with yourself as to how you feel? Do you feel like you're doing enough of one or the other and having some criteria for what that balance looks like? Right. Once you can establish some kind of parameters that work for you, yeah, then you can sort of compare that against your current situation.

00:13:35:26 - 00:13:43:18
Greg
And if you do that on a regular basis, you can ensure that things are staying in balance and if they're out of balance, take remedial measures to address it.

00:13:43:23 - 00:14:01:29
Mary Daphne
Exactly. Because you might have the best job in the world. You might love what you do. And that's great. But you need the balance, because if you keep going on that track that you're on, you'll lead to burnout. There's just no other way around it. Right? So if it means a lot to you, then you're going to also want to take care of yourself and your mental health.

00:14:01:29 - 00:14:28:07
Mary Daphne
Right. So keeping all of that in mind to create more of that balance slash blend, let's say. So that was a nice, you know, way of talking also about quiet quitting because I know that I'm sure many of you have seen that, you know, floating around the Web. And it's something that's now starting to be talked about, even like the Wall Street Journal has talked about it.

00:14:28:07 - 00:14:55:20
Mary Daphne
So it's you know, it was interesting to get our perspectives, I think. And I would love to hear what you have to say on this matter. Is this something that you've come across? Is it something that you consider yourself? Where do you stand? Quiet, quitting? And then what does work life balance look like for you? What does that blend look like and how do you, you know, ensure that you're taking care of yourself but also nurturing your professional self?

00:14:56:07 - 00:14:57:04
Mary Daphne
So those are some things.

00:14:57:26 - 00:14:58:12
Greg
Absolutely.

00:14:58:25 - 00:15:23:07
Mary Daphne
All right. So we're going to see you in another advanced English conversation. Keep up the awesome work. Definitely check out all of the lessons that we have on advanced English. And also, if you're interested in improving your communication skills in English, then check out Explore Learning Communications and I will link it below. You can just go to explore learning eco and you can find all the good stuff there, including our podcast.

00:15:23:07 - 00:15:42:29
Mary Daphne
So speaking of podcasts, if you do like this podcast, it means the world to us when we hear from you, so engage with it in some way. If you have a comment or a question, share it in the Q&A. So if you go to Spotify, you'll find the community tab and just feel free to share whatever your thoughts are in the Q&A.

00:15:43:00 - 00:16:00:29
Mary Daphne
We love hearing from you. And then also feel free to share the podcast because the more people that we can reach, the more we can, you know, build this community of amazing advanced English learners. So that means the world to us. And don't forget to leave this nice review easily up to five stars. It means a lot to us, so we appreciate it.

00:16:01:08 - 00:16:23:07
Mary Daphne
All right. We're going to see you on the next one very soon. Bye for now.

About the Author and the Explearning Academy:

Mary Daphne is an expert in communication, executive skills and professional development. She is the founder of the Explearning Academy, a platform dedicated to helping individuals enhance their social fluency, boost their careers, and elevate their social game. Through immersive group coaching programs like the Executive Communication Lab and self-guided journeys, participants gain the social superpowers and career catapults they've been searching for. If you're ready to take your negotiation skills to the next level and connect with like-minded individuals, visit academy.explearning.co and explore the various plans available. Join the Explearning Academy community and unlock your full potential.

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